Jokes!

[robby017]

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses."

"We don't have any." replied the first blonde.

"Well, if your going to fish, you need fishing licenses." said the Game Warden.

"But officer," replied the second blonde,"we aren't fishing. All we have are magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the ottom of the river."

The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the Game Warden, "take all the debris you want." And with that, the Game Warden left.

As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb Fish Cop," the second blonde said to the other two, "doesn't he know that there are steelhead in this river?!"

[robby017]

A man was stopped by a game-warden in Northern Algonquin Park recently with two buckets of fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing

The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"

The man replied to the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."

"Pet fish?!" the warden replied.

"Yes, sir. Every night I take these here fish down to the lake and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their buckets, and I take em home."

"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!"

The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works."

"O.K. I've GOT to see this!" The game warden was curious.

The man poured the fish in to the river and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said, "Well?"

"Well, what?" the man responded.

"When are you going to call them back?" the game warden prompted.

"Call who back?" the man asked.

"The FISH"

"What fish?" the man asked.

[robby017]

One day, two guys Joe and Bob were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they're fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by.

Joe then said "Gee Bob, I didn't know you had it in you!"

Bob then replies " It's the least I could do. After all I was married to her for the last 30 years."

[Rush]

Good ones robby017

[Rush]

Gurnata qabel ir-referendum ghall-Ewropa, Toni dar fuq Mary u qalla " Mer, ara li tivvota IVA ghax jekk nidhlu fl-unjoni nsiru nies."

"Halli f'idi Ton."  Nsomma, ir-referendum ghadda, dhalna fl-unjoni u Toni mar xtara zewg containers, mela wiehed bis-saqqijiet u l-iehor bil-qliezet ta'taht tan-nisa.

"Mer, jien ghall-Italja, ha mmur inbigh dawn iz-zewg containers u narak 4 gimghat ohra."

Ghadew l-erba gimghat u Toni wasal lura b'dahqa minn widna sa widna...."X'ghidtlek Mer, bihejt kollox u f'erba gimghat qlajt LM2000."

"Mela qlajt ghalqa wkoll.  Jien f'erba gimghat, b'saqqu wiehed u bla qalziet ta'taht qlajt LM4000." 

[maltembu]

Paddy and Mary went to marriage counseling after 25 years.

The therapist asked what the problem was.

Mary had a list - neglect, loneliness, felt unloved.
 
The therapist asked Mary to stand, he unbuttoned her blouse,

caressed her breasts and kissed her passionately.

"This is what your wife needs three times a week.

Can you do this Paddy?"



Paddy thought for a second and said "I could drop her here

Monday and Wednesday, but I go fishing on Friday's."
 

[Maria]

Tajba din.